Posts Tagged ‘celebrity’
Thanks for the rhyme, Zach Galifianakis
Smelly bag of onion bagels rotting in the sun
It’s such a shame to see you go to waste
Though I know decaying rings aren’t good for anyone
I can’t help but long for just a taste
I want to feel the crush of moldy fuzz against my teeth Gorging on you right here in the yard Then break your crust and tongue the putrid liquid underneath — Does that make me some sort of retard?
I want to feel the crush of moldy fuzz against my teeth Gorging on you right here in the yard Then break your crust and tongue the putrid liquid underneath — Does that make me some sort of retard?
08
09 2009
absolutely fab
standing proudly
atop the rocky crag
bronze skin shimmering
beneath the glowing sun
shirt unbuttoned
far too far for comfort
and long blonde locks
flowing freely in the wind
you are half man half onion bagel the love spawn of fabio and a particularly attractive wad of dough
you grace the covers of calendars and cookbooks everywhere bringing women and foodies to tears and to their knees
you are half man half onion bagel the love spawn of fabio and a particularly attractive wad of dough
you grace the covers of calendars and cookbooks everywhere bringing women and foodies to tears and to their knees
17
05 2009
Scent by Numbers
At mile marker 98
just past Route 42
I like to put the windows down
and let fresh air blow through
First I pass the rows of corn tall and green like trees Their smell, though nice, sticks in my teeth so I give them a “3”
Next up is the berry patch a sweet and fragrant heaven But too much sugar rots my nose still they get a “7”
Finally the onion fields come up around the bend Their pungent, piercing, bold bouquet earns them a perfect “10”
I breathe in deep and scrunch my nose just like Robert DeNiro Until I pass the cattle ranch — with its stinky, bagel “Zero”
First I pass the rows of corn tall and green like trees Their smell, though nice, sticks in my teeth so I give them a “3”
Next up is the berry patch a sweet and fragrant heaven But too much sugar rots my nose still they get a “7”
Finally the onion fields come up around the bend Their pungent, piercing, bold bouquet earns them a perfect “10”
I breathe in deep and scrunch my nose just like Robert DeNiro Until I pass the cattle ranch — with its stinky, bagel “Zero”
