Posts Tagged ‘communication’

slow train to reno

yessir, this train is headed west, it is
but don’t think it’ll make it there today
i hear new fangled engines, they just whiz
but this one’s like the ones from yesterday

there’s men who poke the fires with a mace
and carry heavy loads across their back
they bake and boil at a steady pace
and shovel ‘til their fingernails turn black

and when our speed picks up it sure don’t last
‘cuz there’s too many stops along the line
compared to this you’d think that it was fast
to go watch onions ripen on the vine

now don’t go conversatin’ that i’m lyin’
‘cuz some book told you onions grow in dirt
i seen ‘em fall from trees ready fer fryin’
as sure as i am wearin’ this here shirt

you kids today think nothin’s left to learn
from folks like me who’ve fully aged and grown
you just don’t seem to even give a durn
‘bout letting us talk circles all alone

to speak of circles you should oughtta’ know
around this turn you’ll wanna’ peel yer eye
this train we’re on it goes so very slow
you’ll see the onion bagels tumblin’ by


06 2009

Duly Noted

When Snoop Dogg asks you
To break ‘im off a piece
Of Onizzle Bagazzizzle,

He probably isn’t talking
About your Onion Bagel.


06 2009

The Blunder

I bought a buttered bagel
from the baker in my building,
But when I bit that breaded band
it tasted bland and boring

Betting that the baker boiled
a bad batch of his batter,
I barked across the bar that
my bite should have been made better

I’d barely blurted this behest
when back came blistering blame:
This bunch was baked with onion bulbs,
but you bought one marked “Plain”


05 2009

don’t you on the other hand me

there are two sides
to every story
just like
there are two halves
to every onion bagel

unless you don’t
cut it in half

which is
a weird thing
to do
to a perfectly good story


03 2009

Let’s Talk About Heroes

Let’s talk about Heroes
and all the exciting events from last night’s episode
Let’s really get into it
raising our voices
and gesturing with our arms for emphasis
Let’s review all the powers
that each of them has
and think about which ones we’d like
although we’ll be enthusiastic about it
our decisions will be grounded in logic
Let’s mention the Asian guy
and the cheerleader
and the one who’s going to be in that movie
and the one that can fly
(one of them can fly, right?)

Let’s talk about how
I’ve never really seen the show
so I’ve got a lot of catching up to do
Let’s have green tea
and onion bagels
for hours on end
while you tell me all the things that I’ve missed


02 2009

The Golden One

My father always told me “Onion bagels grow on trees”
And so I spent my school-age years amassing expertise
So I could scour the continents and sail the seven seas
Searching for the only plant that would my soul appease

As time elapsed the hope I had was pushed aside by doubt
For I’d found nothing even though I’d traveled all about
And so I grabbed my father and irately I did shout
He said “I meant to say they don’t – did I leave that word out?”


02 2009

a series of revelations


what have we here?

looks like the shoe
is on the other foot

and by “shoe”
__i mean “onion”

and by “foot”
____i mean “bagel”

and by “we”
______i mean “oui”

because i’m actually


01 2009

Text Message From the Delicatessen

Your bagel has been canceled
due to inclement weather

You’ve already been rescheduled
for the next available bagel:
6:05 PM

We apologize for any inconvenience
and we’ve upgraded you to “onion”
at no additional charge.


12 2008

“i think you love that onion bagel more than you love me”

my darling
love of my life
the girl of my dreams
precious little flower
adorable beloved
future mother of my children
the sweetest truest gift there could be

…what did you think was going to happen?


12 2008