Posts Tagged ‘crime’

first, the bad news:

the dealer’s corpse was rotting at a quite alarming rate
i couldn’t get the bags of blow to all fit in their crate
on accident i handcuffed my own ankle to the grate
and my partner in a panic crashed our car right out the gate

the fire from the hill was now engulfing the estate
and the sirens in the distance signaled our impending date
i didn’t have much choice but to accept my destined fate
so i grabbed an onion bagel, said a prayer of thanks and ate




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04

02 2009

Sonnet II

stopping by Starbuck’s showed I was busted
for when I ordered my caffé latte
seems my credit card couldn’t be trusted
’twas on account of the economy

with only cash enough for a bagel
redfaced I hurriedly made for the door
stashed a pistol in my trousers’ leg hole
ran to the bank, made them lay on the floor

“I’ve got a gun! it’s here in my jacket!
now empty the vault! while I take a bite!”
dreams of the wealth I’d make from this racket
stopped short — for my bagel didn’t taste right

cops declared I was easy to run in
(gun in my mouth, and coat smeared with onion)




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15

01 2009

Sworn Testimony of the Accused Onion Bagel

I cannot tell a lie
I have no alibi
For the night the murder took place
And although it seems damning
I have been seen slamming
Beer bottles in the deceased’s face
You see, when I’m drinking
I sometimes stop thinking
That vice I do surely possess
But as for this crime
You’re wasting your time
If you think that this bagel will confess
Instead my suggestion
Is for you to question
What made your detectives so sloppy
It takes not a sleuth
To uncover the truth
Since your crime scene is plastered with poppy




07

01 2009