{"id":1190,"date":"2009-11-07T19:48:44","date_gmt":"2009-11-08T03:48:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/?p=1190"},"modified":"2009-11-07T19:48:44","modified_gmt":"2009-11-08T03:48:44","slug":"the-kitchen-burglar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/?p=1190","title":{"rendered":"the kitchen burglar"},"content":{"rendered":"<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">he&#8217;s a kitchen burglar, and he&#8217;s the best<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">he&#8217;ll shred your stuff like a chicken breast<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">lurks past linoleum without a whisper<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">then bags all the lettuce right out of your crisper<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">no oven is safe,\u00a0no stove is secure<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">he swallows up dishes like soup du jour<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">he&#8217;ll spin through faster than a hard-boiled egg&#8217;ll<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">and leave your place hollow as an onion bagel<\/span><\/address>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>he&#8217;s a kitchen burglar, and he&#8217;s the best he&#8217;ll shred your stuff like a chicken breast lurks past linoleum without a whisper then bags all the lettuce right out of your crisper no oven is safe,\u00a0no stove is secure he swallows up dishes like soup du jour he&#8217;ll spin through faster than a hard-boiled egg&#8217;ll [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[81,184],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1190"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1191,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190\/revisions\/1191"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1190"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1190"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1190"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}