{"id":205,"date":"2009-07-04T23:39:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-05T06:39:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/?p=205"},"modified":"2010-02-15T08:45:07","modified_gmt":"2010-02-15T16:45:07","slug":"the-competitor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/?p=205","title":{"rendered":"The Competitor"},"content":{"rendered":"<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">His belly is unbeatable<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">His titles, all repeatable<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">There&#8217;s not a bagel in this world<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">that he would find uneatable<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">He needs not to bite off the crust<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">You&#8217;ll never see him cough or fuss<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">He bypasses his teeth<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">and sends them straight to his esophagus<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">Dunks each ring in the water<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">Wins all bouts by a slaughter<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">And even with his onion breath<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">he makes out with your daughter<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">The victor in the square again<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">The answer to each prayer we send<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">Our bagel eating champion<\/span><\/address>\n<address><span style=\"font-style: normal;\">makes us proud to be American<\/span><\/address>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>His belly is unbeatable His titles, all repeatable There&#8217;s not a bagel in this world that he would find uneatable He needs not to bite off the crust You&#8217;ll never see him cough or fuss He bypasses his teeth and sends them straight to his esophagus Dunks each ring in the water Wins all bouts [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[66,259,147,260],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/205"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=205"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/205\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1517,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/205\/revisions\/1517"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=205"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=205"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poemsaboutonionbagels.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=205"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}