Posts Tagged ‘danger’


Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me!
My levels are dropping dangerously!
Don’t look in my ear or knock on my knee!
Just gimme an onion bagel I.V.!


05 2009

Bagel on the Train Track

There’s a bagel on the train track
ever’body get back
It’s a-comin’ up fast
how we gonna’ get past?
If it’s mighty hard n’ stale
it’ll knock us off the rail
But if it’s flavored onion
to hit it is the real sin

topics: , ,


03 2009

question for the fda

voodoo bagels
high upon the shelf
infinite power
in your endless loops

when sliced
others are cut
when toasted
another is burned
when eaten
someone else’s breath smells like onion

how can you be legal

topics: , ,


02 2009


is for onion
the bagel i like most
N is for not ever equating it
to toast – that would be insanity,
which is what the I is for, and if you try to
say it’s not, i’ll just come   bust down your door
and i’ll wear a mask,             and i’ll carry an axe
and a can of gas and              a bunch of matches
and you’ll be all like,          oh god, no! which in
case you didn’t get it       is what the second O
is for, but i won’t even hear your pleas,
cause i’ll be busy creaming cheese
once you get a taste of these,
you’ll Never make that
error again


02 2009