new! - "boiling emotion" search story
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the search for life's meaning can take many shapes - in this case, it's a ring.
Please Don’t Call The ASPCA
I think your dog is drunk
Did somebody feed it beer?
It’s lookin’ all glassy-eyed
And lecherous
Like it’d wanna hump my leg
If it had more energy
That dog’s stumbling in circles And barking at the toilet And forgetting to life its leg When it pees Pass me another onion bagel ‘Cause this is pretty fun to watch
That dog’s stumbling in circles And barking at the toilet And forgetting to life its leg When it pees Pass me another onion bagel ‘Cause this is pretty fun to watch
29
05 2009
clarity
through the clear plastic bag,
he watched the sun setting
on the day, and the life that he knew
through the clear plastic bag, he saw his own breath condense like a fresh morning dew
through the clear plastic bag, he gasped and he clawed and thought that his lungs would just melt
through the clear plastic bag, he knew oh so clearly exactly how onion bagels felt
through the clear plastic bag, he saw his own breath condense like a fresh morning dew
through the clear plastic bag, he gasped and he clawed and thought that his lungs would just melt
through the clear plastic bag, he knew oh so clearly exactly how onion bagels felt
28
05 2009
aargh
enough with the talking animals already
or plots about world war II
and i got the picture long ago
that teenage boys try real hard to get laid
robots are generally difficult to kill but that doesn’t mean i want to watch someone try and i couldn’t care less if some lovelorn baker chick captures her emotions inside onion bagels
so hollywood, if you’re listening is it really so hard to understand that i only want to see movies about pirates (or at least people with hooks for hands)?
robots are generally difficult to kill but that doesn’t mean i want to watch someone try and i couldn’t care less if some lovelorn baker chick captures her emotions inside onion bagels
so hollywood, if you’re listening is it really so hard to understand that i only want to see movies about pirates (or at least people with hooks for hands)?
27
05 2009
too little, too late
i’m drowning in the ocean
not a life raft in sight
this little toaster waffle
won’t keep me upright
i’m fighting through the currents in search of a buoy that itty bitty muffin top doesn’t float things worth hooey
i’m flailing in the water someone toss me a ring! your tiny onion bagel couldn’t rescue anything
i’m fighting through the currents in search of a buoy that itty bitty muffin top doesn’t float things worth hooey
i’m flailing in the water someone toss me a ring! your tiny onion bagel couldn’t rescue anything
26
05 2009
how this poison i’m about to inject you with will quickly and painfully kill you
within seconds,
it attacks
your respiration,
shriveling your lungs
like dried
onion flakes
soon your heart will feel squeezed in a bagel hole, a tortuous struggle with every pump
finally your brain will begin to melt, mixing and mushing ’til it turns to cream cheese
…
excuse me one moment i must go fix breakfast (why do i even try this before eating?)
soon your heart will feel squeezed in a bagel hole, a tortuous struggle with every pump
finally your brain will begin to melt, mixing and mushing ’til it turns to cream cheese
…
excuse me one moment i must go fix breakfast (why do i even try this before eating?)
25
05 2009
tour
encounters
this is important:
the water must be warm
the yeast must be dry
the dough must rise for about an hour
this means something: i call but no answer i wait for the tone i try again in thirty minutes
this is important: the salt must be kosher the onions must be toasted the rings must rise again, half as long as before
this means something: you say you’re not home your car’s in your driveway your silhouette’s in your window, dancing
this is important: the water must be sugared the sheet must be greased the oven must be preheated to 400 degrees
this means something: the fire alarms blare the ambulance arrives late the police say it was all an accident
this means something: i call but no answer i wait for the tone i try again in thirty minutes
this is important: the salt must be kosher the onions must be toasted the rings must rise again, half as long as before
this means something: you say you’re not home your car’s in your driveway your silhouette’s in your window, dancing
this is important: the water must be sugared the sheet must be greased the oven must be preheated to 400 degrees
this means something: the fire alarms blare the ambulance arrives late the police say it was all an accident
23
05 2009
This is how it ends
STAT!
your test results are in
the hospital facilities
are all state of the art,
with sections for diseases
of the lungs, skin, brain and heart
yet doctors aren’t the only ones who meet such strict criteria, the bar’s set just as high down at the campus cafeteria
the freshest fruits and veggies are brought in every day, and pastas, meats and cheeses form a dazzling buffet
but probably the choicest part would be the bagel station, with every flavor known to man of ringéd dough temptation
plain, egg, garlic, sesame, blueberry, everything and countless others kneel before the mighty onion king
if you don’t want to taste all that or at least give just one lick, then turn around and see a nurse ’cause you are truly sick
yet doctors aren’t the only ones who meet such strict criteria, the bar’s set just as high down at the campus cafeteria
the freshest fruits and veggies are brought in every day, and pastas, meats and cheeses form a dazzling buffet
but probably the choicest part would be the bagel station, with every flavor known to man of ringéd dough temptation
plain, egg, garlic, sesame, blueberry, everything and countless others kneel before the mighty onion king
if you don’t want to taste all that or at least give just one lick, then turn around and see a nurse ’cause you are truly sick
20
05 2009
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