Archive for September, 2009

work in progress

half-baked
misshaped
sticky onion mess
doesn’t look like anything
you’d ever serve
your guests

patience
progress
perfection comes with time
what now appears substandard
will in moments
be sublime




20

09 2009

Tanka #3

Which bagel to choose:
Plain, wheat, garlic, blueberry?
Indecision kills –
Some hand plucks the last onion,
Rue the one that got away.




19

09 2009

dreamless sleep

dreamless sleep

a dog without a tongue
an unpotted plant
cream cheese smothering the cold, heartless onion bagel that is my life
that isn’t even there

the only sleep i ever know




18

09 2009

Olde Town

I dropped my bag upon the cobblestone,
And all my cherished things were strewn about:
My phone and wallet, sunglasses and keys,
A tin of breath mints I’d not opened yet,
Some tokens for the bus I had to take,
And flowers for the girl I’d ride it to,
A nearly finished thesis manuscript,
My passport, birth certificate, false teeth,
(Some real teeth and a couple fingertips)
And several handfuls of pure gold doubloons.

Though this did not upset me much at all,
I wept to see my onion bagel fall.




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17

09 2009

Forever Selfish

I’ve had my share of onion bagels
and told my share of lies
Like “I’m all out of onion bagels”
when I had vast supplies

But sadly I can’t blame these fibs
on errors of my youth
For even in old age my hungry
mouth tells this untruth




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16

09 2009

Sonnet IX

I once had all for which I could have dreamed:
A warm place where my chilled body could toast,
My crust was hale; my cheese was soft and creamed
And there! My better half that I loved most

But fast like startled dough my fortunes fell
With flesh, once fresh, turned stale and hard as stone;
She parted without even a farewell
Leaving me bitter, broken and alone

Now as I drink away my passing years
(Enough to make a dozen men go blind),
My glass collects these falling onion tears
While just one slurring thought rolls round my mind:

Perhaps she would still be with me tonight,
If we’d have borne a mini bagel bite.




15

09 2009

Talent, Schmalent

What do the Hoff and that British guy know?
America’s Got Onion Bagels” is a much better show.




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14

09 2009

Haiku #10

Packing dilemma:
Carry-on onion bagels
Or risk checking them?




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13

09 2009

I hate football

Crooked referees with your pocket full of lies
Revising history right before my very eyes

Saying plays are legal even though they’re not allowed
Showing zero shame in pandering to the home crowd

You clearly have no problem selling out your very souls
I bet you’d even call my onion bagels jelly rolls




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12

09 2009

Limerick #7

Today when I sat down to breakfast
I threw a gosh darn bullshoot heck fest
I had to complain,
For my bagel was plain –
What a hot tranny onionless wrecked mess




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11

09 2009