new! - "boiling emotion" search story

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the search for life's meaning can take many shapes - in this case, it's a ring.

Pacific

I spied a bagel on the beach
Shining in the sand,
Alas! It was beyond the reach
Of my eager hand;
I swam and struggled, soaking wet
Through the rising tide,
But never could quite get to it
No matter how I tried;
To the ocean’s depths I chased
That lusted onioned ring,
Plainly for the merest taste
I’d do anything;
My air-starved brain became less clear
And then threw in the towel,
I dreamt that bagel cupped my ear
And heard my stomach growl.




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07

08 2009


by andy
posted in uncategorized
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bagel, bagel

saw, saw
drop, drop
press, press
pop, pop
ooh, ooh
plate, plate
pat, pat
scrape, scrape
whiff, whiff
wide, wide
crunch, crunch
bite, bite
taste, taste
’nion, ’nion
what, what
fun, fun




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06

08 2009


by andy
posted in uncategorized
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hallcrastination

i’m super duper sleepified,
and droopy lidded bleary-eyed,
my brain feels like it’s been deep fried
but i’ve got work to finish.

so if it’s cool with all of you —
hitler, big bird, captain lou —
i’ll watch the onion bagel crew
do their dance tomorrow.




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05

08 2009


by andy
posted in uncategorized
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bagel lag

slow toaster
staying in the toaster
staying light for so long

brown up those onions
and kiss me already

daddy’s got a plane to catch




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04

08 2009


by andy
posted in uncategorized
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richmond

my onion bagel is breaded and fried
and crusted with bubbling cheese,
on steaming grits it softly resides,
its hole filled with fresh collard greens

chicken fried memories and larded dreams
greet me with each bite i chew,
and i feel at home on these strange southern streets,
’cause no food says comfort like you




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03

08 2009


by andy
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The Call

I called 911, fearing the chef was dead,
Cause he slipped on an onion and fell on his head,
I had no first aid kit or hospital bed,
Just kitchen utensils and dough for ringed bread.

Luckily the voice told me just what to do,
Had me form a bagel big enough for two,
It rose ’round his neck so I think he’ll pull through,
‘Cause this brace keeps his head from moving fro and to.




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02

08 2009


by andy
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theological practitioner

my chompers are sore
i can’t eat no more
so many onion bagels galore

i’ll go to my dentist
the oral hygenist
his god’s on my side (he’s a 7th day adventist)




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01

08 2009


by andy
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convenience, man, convenience

I’m traveling, man
I’m a
t r a v e l i n g  m a n
and I eat and I drink
what e v e r  I can
No liquids a l l o w e d
past the x-ray machine
No food to be bought
without  s p e n d i n g
some  g r e e n

Don’t have much cash
and it’s time to board
Give my coins
to  t h e  m a n
for the  o n e  t h i n g
I’ll afford

It’s a plain bagel
a  p l a n e  bagel
and it ain’t no
n o t h i n g t o w r i t e h o m e a b o u t
bagel
‘Cause back home
that  r i c h  o n i o n  c r u n c h
can’t be beat

But  t h i s  i s
a buzzkill
at  3 0 , 0 0 0  feet




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31

07 2009


by andy
posted in uncategorized
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It’s been a long week here in the bagel taste-testing offices

Oh, what a mess of work in my inbox,
Cheeses, butters, herbed schmears and lox,
And bagels, of course, piled high as Fort Knox,
My burden weighs heavy, like cart to the ox.

But oxen can carry much more than they know,
Inspiring workers with all that they hoe,
So I’ll taste these baked rings of oniony dough,
And send each, once bitten, to the outbox below.




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30

07 2009


by andy
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Limerick #6

I always am totally irked,
When bagel dough gets overworked —
The shapes fall so flat,
That onions look fat,
And I feel like my chain’s getting jerked.




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29

07 2009


by andy
posted in limerick
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